That’s Really the Question of the Day
When I’m getting ready to write a Judge-Your-Neighbor Worksheet, there are often many choices of what to write about. But what I really want to know is “What’s going through this chicken’s mind?”
From one perspective, my stressful situation is never really any big deal. I can easily say, “I don’t need to work this.”
But The Work is not for that wise, expanded part of me.
The Work Is for the Chicken in Me
And chickens are scared. Even if there’s no real danger.
And so am I. Deep down in any stressful situation, I’m a chicken. Maybe only 1% chicken. But my worksheet is for the chicken part of me.
The part of me that’s really afraid it’s going to get eaten.
This Became Really Clear for a Client Recently Too
He was trying to narrow down what was bothering him to write a Judge-Your-Neighbor Worksheet. It was a particular situation that was stressful for him. And he kept trying to identify different parts of it. But nothing seemed to hold it for him.
We spent probably half an hour exploring what to write on that worksheet.
In the end, what really held it for him was his simple gut feeling, “She’s going to eat me alive.” So we put that on line one of the worksheet.
He Knew it Was Irrational
And petty.
I mean, why waste a worksheet on something like this?
But for me there’s only one reason to write a worksheet: because on some level it feels real to me. I don’t care what my mind comes up with. If it feels real to me, I write it on my worksheet.
Petty is good when writing worksheets. Because petty is exactly where I’m still stuck.
So I invite you to make your next worksheet petty. From the perspective of the chicken, getting eaten alive is not a petty thought. So be a chicken and write exactly what you think from that point of view.
Have a great week,
Todd
“The instructions are: “Allow yourself to be as judgmental and petty as you really feel. Don’t try to be ‘spiritual’ or kind.” The pettier we can be when writing, the more likely it is that we’ll benefit from The Work.” — Byron Katie, Loving What Is, Introduction.
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