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Finding It Hard To Do Your Inner Work Alone?

Taking care of yourself emotionally is not always easy. Many times, family members are a part of the problem so you often can’t turn to them. Even friends, supportive as they are, often cannot hold you the way you need to be held. They want to help too much. They want to advise. They’re too involved. Can they be fully trusted to not interfere?

You need a safe harbor for doing inner work, a place where you can be completely objective, a place where you can start to listen to yourself, and not get well-meaning but distracting advice from others. 

This may leave you no choice but to do your inner work alone, which can be a good solution for those dedicated souls who actually do it. But for the rest of us, working alone is not enough:

  • Many of us put self-care last – letting interruptions and the demands of others get in the way.
  • It takes courage to do inner work – sometimes it is just too intimidating to do it alone.
  • It’s hard to listen to yourself – you may need others who can truly listen without judging and interfering in order to hear yourself.
  • It’s easy to get distracted – the mind may need the support of others to keep you on track.

It’s not easy to be consistent without a support system and it can be tough having no one to listen to you when you need it most. 

You'll Have More Fun With Us

If you’re looking for a community of open-minded, loving people dedicated to their daily inner work, then you’ve come to the right place. We are an intimate community of currently 42 members—some of us participating daily since 2013. This is also where I do my work every day seven days a week.

Here you will find a great combination of both kindness and focus. We think of ourselves as a group of “independent researchers,” researching our own inner worlds. We each work independently on ourselves, but we also share our work and encourage each other. It is a great support system. 

How To Research Your Inner World?

If you want more clarity, more freedom, more compassion, and more forgiveness in your life, looking inward is the most direct way to find these things. When you change your inner point of view, the world shifts within your experience. Then clarity and kindness on the outside come automatically. You don’t have to do anything other than shift your inner point of view.

But how the heck do you do this? Stresses of all kinds block the inner view. It’s great in theory to shift perspective. However, on your own you may find it difficult to work through these interfering stresses. This is even more true when stress is activated. The stressed mind tends to panic and doesn’t think rationally. How are you supposed to work through a difficult issue in that state of mind? 

To do this, the mind needs is a systematic approach to dealing with stress. A structure to hold the mind in its time of need. A way that leads directly out of the problem, but also one that is patient with the stressed mind however it shows up (sometimes quite irrationally).

We Use A Systematic Approach

What makes our community especially effective in doing inner work is the approach we take. We use a well-established, systematic approach to stress relief. 

We are not just a support group here to listen to stressful stories. We use a powerful method of self-inquiry for transforming those stories. That way, we’re not left just commiserating with each other, but rather celebrating the wins that each of us makes in our inner work.

The first step in joining our community is to learn this systematic approach to inner work by taking The Work 101 course. In this course, you will learn a method of self-inquiry called The Work of Byron Katie. 

You’ll be a full member of our community during the course. And you will have the option to continue with us long-term once you complete the course. 

1. Take The Work 101.
2. Experience the support of our community.
3. Make stress relief a long-term practice in our community.

We Are All Equals Here

Each member of our group is just like you. We also want, or need, to do our inner work. We also need the support of a group to keep up our practice. 

You will be welcomed as a fellow traveler on this journey with us. We share many of your same issues, fears, hopes, and dreams. We too want to live a more peaceful, happy, loving life. And we would love to have you join us.

Because we are all equals like points on a circle and because we come together using a common process sometimes referred to as “inquiry,” our community is called “Inquiry Circle.” 

Our Agreement To You

You may be hesitant to open up to doing your inner work in a group. 

With us, YOU are always in control. You decide how deep to go. You decide what is true for you, not us. 

We promise not to interfere with your process wherever it may go. Our job is to simply hold the space with love and understanding as you do your own work. Every stressful thought and situation you bring will be met with unconditional understanding here.

Though many of us practice The Work every day, you are free to participate as often or as little as you like. There is a lot of freedom in this community.

Our Experience

I come from a long-term background of spiritual practice, learning to meditate when I was six and living in an ashram for about ten years in my twenties. Since 2007, I have been practicing The Work almost daily and I have supported thousands of clients to learn and practice it too. 

All of our community members have taken The Work 101 as a part of joining the group. Some have been doing this practice for decades. Some are relatively new. But all of us share an enthusiasm for this way of looking inside and finding a more peaceful way of seeing things. 

How It Works

community

Our Inquiry Circle community meets on a password-protected online forum. Some of us show up daily, others less frequently. There is no right way to do it, and your frequency may change over time.

The forum is open 24/7. You can login and do your work in written form anytime of day or night, from your computer, tablet, or phone. Simply choose a template and follow the directions to do your work. Once you post your work, others will read it and leave supportive comments. I also encourage you to read other people’s work and leave comments for them.

We have a set of well-developed comment guidelines refined over many years letting you know what kinds of comments are appropriate in our community and what are not. We all agree to follow these guidelines. 

And we also all agree to confidentiality. Participants live all over the world, and this also adds to the experience of confidentiality as you will be working with people outside of your normal social circles. 

We welcome all languages. Currently, we have templates in the following languages (and we can add more if you need them):

English
French
German
Spanish

It is somehow relieving to see that we all have similar stresses around the world, and it is fun to experience the overlap of cultures here. Furthermore, if you move or travel, our community will be there for you wherever you land. 

Spoken Work and Written Work

Doing The Work of Byron Katie in spoken form

We mainly do The Work in written form using the templates I mentioned. But if you prefer doing your work in spoken form with a partner, we have growing options for that too. We offer several drop-in sessions every week. All you have to do is show up to the Zoom session and you will be assigned a partner. Then, you’ll work with your partner in the breakout rooms during the call.

You can also request a spoken-work partner in our Lounge at any time or by sending a private message to anyone in the group.

studying together in a library

We also have drop-in sessions for written work. In those sessions, you join us on Zoom and we each work silently in written form as if working in a library together. This can be an effective way of doing The Work.

The idea is that we tend to do our work more regularly, and with more focus when we come together to do it. You will find many opportunities to be together here.

The Structure of the Forum

Here are the main sub-forums of Inquiry Circle:

  1. The Work Forum – where we all do The Work in written form using templates provided.
  2. The Lounge – where all announcements and other sharing is posted
  3. Questions Forum – where you can ask your questions and deepen your understanding about anything related to The Work
  4. Private Areas – in case you want to do The Work privately (alone or with another person or small private group)
  5. Drop-in Sessions – where you can choose from regular Zoom sessions where we do The Work together (spoken sessions, and silent sessions for written work)
  6. The Breakfast Club – an optional program for setting a goal each month (doing The Work every day, 5 days a week, 3 days a week, 2 days a week, or once a week). You have an accountability partner. You start at $30. Each month if you make your goal, your price goes down by $5, or $10 if your and your partner both make your goals, and it goes up by $5 if you don’t. You will quickly get to $0. This can be a great incentive for building a steady practice. Byron Katie says, “Do The Work for Breakfast, and have a great life.” That’s what we do here.
  7. Monday Zoom Calls With Todd – Every Monday, I host a group call for 30 minutes where we share anything about Inquiry Circle, our experience doing The Work. You can ask questions or I facilitate someone to do The Work.
  8. Inquiry Circle Monthly Seminars – Once a month, we meet on Zoom to go in depth into a particular subject to think about how to do The Work on it and then we use the breakout rooms to do The Work in pairs.
  9. Virtual Retreats – Inquiry Circle members get a special rate for our quarterly virtual retreats which are a great way to go more deeply into The Work over a weekend. These retreats have sessions every two hours around the clock (with one hour break between each session). You can come to as many as you like during the weekend.
  10. Guidelines – we all agree to the guidelines, respect the confidentiality of our members, and keep the spirit of The Work

Be A Temporary Member First

holding hands

We offer community-based courses where you will be a part of our community for a short period of time before committing to an annual membership.  

  • The Work 101 – Required before you can become a long-term member of our community. Start anytime.
  • The Work 102 – Deepen your practice of spoken work. Prerequisite: The Work 101. Offered periodically.
  • Virtual Retreats – Join us for a spoken-work-only retreat over a weekend. Offered four times per year.

Once you complete The Work 101, you can get an annual membership and continue with us for as many years as you like.

Who Is This Community For?

community

This community is for anyone who wants to do systematic, self-exploration using The Work of Byron Katie. It is for anyone wanting to work through their stress. It is for those with an independent researcher mindset who enjoy writing out their work. It is for those who are self-disciplined but who also like the support of community. It is for kind-hearted people who can get along respectfully with others.

You do not have to be familiar with The Work. Get started with The Work 101 where you can simultaneously learn The Work and try out our community.

Reviews

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Doing The Work with the IC Community

Rated 5.0 out of 5
June 28, 2023

I found doing the work on a regular basis alone difficult for me. I felt isolated. And when I was struggling with my work, there was no one to connect with for insights to help me see my issue in a different way. I wanted a community to share doing the work. And I wanted it to be accessible when I wanted to do the work. Using IC has provided me with the community to do the work on a regular basis. I can access it any time of the day or night and other members of IC comment on my work which makes me feel part of a community. I had an incident with a manager during a work meeting and returned to my desk and did the work on IC immediately while I was in the emotional turmoil of the situation. There was no waiting for a scheduled appointment. It was wonderful to do the work right away and the feedback from the other participants was so helpful to highlight and provide new insights.

Karen

Great support! And fun, too!

Rated 5.0 out of 5
June 23, 2023

Like most of us (I found out) life takes over quickly, after any course. And I’m one of those who are not so efficient in setting fixed times, not even for things that I know are good for me. Also, I kind of get attached to people that I’ve regularly met in a course. Perhaps this has to do with a sense of belonging, a sense of ‘family’, that you develop because of some affinities like ‘doing The Work of Byron Katie’.

Well, I’ve tried before to help myself do The Work regularly, but those trials never were very successful. That feels quite powerless, helpless. Part of me felt like a failure.

There are so many ways to help yourself keep doing The Work – which was my goal in the first place. I’m sensitive to keeping promises, also to myself, and I need some micromanagement for this to happen, like doing The Work with others. At the same time, in Inquiry Circle you’re totally free: there’s no ‘punishment’ if you never show up. Of course, it does cost you some money, so that’s an incentive as well. AND you have the support of a certified facilitator whenever needed! I love the Open Sessions, Monday Zoom Sessions, and the increasing number of Drop-in Sessions.

Since I have almost no income, and thus no subscriptions except Inquiry Circle, I’m doing the best I can to get what I came for. In other situations I might still feel like “Man, it’s actually too expensive for me!”, and after a few months of being a member, I realized I didn’t have that thought so strongly with Inquiry Circle. Strong proof that it works for me!

There is so much more support here to handle small and big things in life that trigger stress in my thinking! Since you can choose your own appropriate format (days, times, written or spoken form, on your own, with others, even “with others on your own,” …) it feels like abundant and inviting chances to do The Work. We also have fun together, and although I never feel lonely, I can imagine that if you are, you can’t keep that up in the welcoming and warm atmosphere of Inquiry Circle. If your search for inner truth, freedom, and peace is sincere you can’t keep up any stressful feeling/thought there. And all at your very own and unique pace! You never have to go beyond your own evolution (because you can’t).

Inquiry Circle helps me to keep things in perspective, grow, and expand together. I feel involved with myself and others, and I love to nourish and increase my feeling of gratitude, which is very easy in Inquiry Circle. It’s light (meaning humorous and faithful) and intense at the same time, and that’s what I like about (my) life as well.

(I could go on and on!)

Marieke Van Coppenolle

The best place to PRACTICE the Work

Rated 5.0 out of 5
June 23, 2023

Before discovering Inquiry Circle I cannot say which problem in particular I had, it was more a general feeling of “no satisfaction”. I can remember being unhappy about my husband, my weight, my addictions (eating too much and drinking too much). Problems of wanting to please everybody and fit everywhere I went which made me unable to be completely myself but wear a mask of extreme politeness.

I also felt a lot of guilt and inadequacy for not living my life as I “should” have (no career, being just a mum at home). I used to worry a lot, for my kids, for the future in general, about money… Planning a lot and feeling stuck. So there was a lot of frustration as an underlying foundation of my mental life.

Frustration is a really good word to describe what I felt, Inadequacy also. It was not a huge pain but quite constant. I lived with it. I had big tantrums also from time to time. I tried many different approaches (antidepressants for ex), and yoga helped a lot. Reading self-help books also, like a sign that there was a way out. But I never really practiced these ways. Till I discovered Byron Katie. I went to her School, loved it but then didn’t practice.

It was only when I joined Inquiry Circle that the Work actually happened inside me. Todd and his explanations like the Work 101 but also his availability to answer my questions enabled me to PRACTICE and stop using my analytical mind.

And also there is the community: other participants are wonderful for sharing and doing the Work together. Sometimes we are the client, sometimes we are the facilitator. There is so much learning and living from these two points of view.

When we witness as facilitators we learn a lot and it triggers our own situations when we work alongside the client.

The other wonderful thing for me in Inquiry Circle is the FLEXIBILITY of it. I feel free to go when I want and do as much as I want. I notice that when I don’t do much my life becomes more tricky.

The moment I realized that Inquiry Circle was excellent for addressing my issues started very early, I could say the first week. And then more and more I can feel it’s essential for my well-being. It was not a big moment of realization but many small insights. And often I have to find them again or go deeper.

At IC we learn to be open to everything, even setting back or having to Work a situation again and again. Everything can be judged and worked on. Now I feel much more confident and serene. I feel so much more in charge of my life, responsible. I know what is my job (take care of myself) and how to stay out of others’ business. It’s not always easy of course and I still have lots to learn from this life. As I get older the tool of the Work is getting even more precious. My relationships with my husband, family, and friends are much much easier. I laugh more. Life is beautiful I see it every day, much much more than before I joined Inquiry Circle.

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Sophie

Frequently Asked Questions

Inquiry Circle costs $560/year and is an annual membership. You have the option to renew or cancel each year. 

The Work 101, the prerequisite for joining Inquiry Circle costs $740 and includes a 9-week membership in Inquiry Circle as well as a personal trainer.

Yes, if you would like to participate and have financial need, pleas contact us to apply for a scholarship.

No, some participants do only spoken work, joining in our Drop-in sessions, Monday Zoom calls, Monthly Seminars, and Virtual Retreats. As the size of our community grows, there will be more Drop-in Sessions for spoken work. Ideally, I would love to have them available 24/7. But in the meantime, written work is already available 24/7 on the forum.

Yes, you can participate as much or as little as you like in Inquiry Circle. We are there 24/7 for you, but we enourage you to listen to yourself and follow your own inner guidance about when and how much to participate.

Yes, we have templates that are compatible with phone, tablet, and computer use. 

Start To Successfully Work Through Your Stress

As a part of our community, you’ll start getting your inner work done. That means:

  • You have less stress
  • You become more confident and courageous
  • You feel more connected with yourself
  • You feel like you’re always growing
  • You feel more in control of your emotions
  • Stressful situations are seen as doorways to learning
  • You become emotionally more available for others in your life

Don't Stay Stuck If You're Going Nowhere On Your Own

If you’re not finding the time or the energy for your inner work, the problem can get worse. Stress has a tendency to keep building up. If you do nothing:

  • Nothing will change.
  • You’ll keep putting your self-care on the back burner
  • Stress will keep accumulating
  • You’ll have less bandwidth to deal with it
  • You’ll keep running around putting out fires instead of dealing with the root causes of stress
  • You can end up being overwhelmed or depressed
  • You’ll miss the warmth and camaraderie of others traveling the same path of inner growth

Go from feeling alone and not getting your inner work done to feeling supported and making inner freedom a priority in your life.

Join Our Community Today

Start by taking The Work 101.

If you have already taken The Work 101, please use the form below to apply.

Apply to Join Inquiry Circle Here

Please submit your application to join Inquiry Circle by filling in the form below.
The cost of Inquiry Circle membership is $560/year.

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