An Unusual Turnaround

“It doesn’t follow me” could have the unusual turnaround, “I don’t lead it.”

This is an Unusual Turnaround

It shows up occasionally and is often overlooked or discarded. But it can be quite meaningful.

If the mare above was working the thought, “My foal doesn’t follow me,” here are the standard turnarounds:

1. (to the self) I don’t follow myself.
2. (to the other) I don’t follow my foal.
3. (to the opposite) My foal does follow me.

But here’s the unusual turnaround I’m talking about: I don’t lead my foal.

I Call It the Complimentary Turnaround

At first glance, it seems like it should be disqualified as a double turnaround. Two things have been changed from the original statement. But it actually has good meaning. If I don’t lead well, how can I expect my foal to follow well?

This turnaround seems to point to an equal but opposite action: following vs. leading. And, like all good turnarounds, it brings the responsibility back to me. If they are not following, are there any ways I can improve the way I lead?

Here's Another Example

Original statement: She eats too slowly.

Here are the standard turnarounds:

1. (to the self) I eat too slowly (for me).
2. (to the other) I eat too slowly (for her)
3. (to the opposite) She doesn’t eat too slowly.

And here’s this unusual turnaround: I eat too quickly. (That’s why it appears that she eats slowly.)

Again, this is the equal and opposite side of the same truth. And it’s a turnaround I wouldn’t want to miss.

And Another Example

Original statement: He doesn’t listen to me.

Here are the standard turnarounds:

1. (to the self) I don’t listen to me.
2. (to the other) I don’t listen to him.
3. (to the opposite) He does listen to me.

And here’s this unusual turnaround: I don’t speak to him. (The responsibility is on my speaking as much as on his listening. Maybe I don’t speak clearly enough, or I don’t speak to what he’s interested in but rather I am just focused on myself when I speak.)

Very Interesting Stuff

I encourage you to play with this turnaround and see if proves useful in your work.

“Turn the original statement around any way you want to until you find the turnarounds that penetrate the most.” — Byron Katie, Loving What Is.

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