There Is Truth and Non-Truth in Everything
So why limit your questioning to opinions only? Some of my most fascinating discoveries have come from questioning solid facts.
This usually comes up in Line 1 of a Judge-Your-Neighbor Worksheet. In fact, it happened just last week with a client.
He Was Working a Situation from Age Five
His older brother, whom he worshipped, had bought him a clay set he had wanted, but on the way home his brother threw it over a high fence. It was the beginning of confusion and distrust with his brother that lasted a lifetime.
So he wrote on Line 1, “I’m confused with Bob because he threw away my clay set.”
Now This Is a Straight Fact
And it made my client pause when he answered “yes” to questions 1 and 2 of The Work: yes it is true, and yes I can absolutely know it’s true.
I reminded him that “yes” is as valid an answer to questions 1 and 2 as “no.” The only we’re doing in answering these questions is finding the truth, our own truth.
Question 4 Was Also a Bit Tricky
At least the mind can make it seem that way.
In reality, question 4, when questioning facts, is not tricky at all. Simply, “Who would you be without that thought?”
If that thought, “He threw away my clay set,” was not dominant in the mind, who would you be even when Bob throws it away? It was a bit of a mind bender to see it, but the answer was actually simple, “Happy, relaxed, no problem at all walking home from the store.”
The stress was not coming from Bob’s action, but from the thought of it.
Another way to ask this question when dealing with a fact is, “Who would you be if you didn’t think it was a bad thing that Bob threw it away?”
But My Favorite Thing About Questioning Facts Is The Unexpected Surprises
For example the turnaround, “I threw away Bob,” was an eye-opener. Bob threw away the clay set, but my client threw Bob away. When put in that perspective, everything shifted.
There were many other fascinating turnarounds from this worksheet including, “I threw away myself,” and “Bob didn’t throw away my clay set.” It turned out that Bob was trying to “toughen him up.” And in his own way it was a genuine expression of love.
So don’t hesitate to question solid facts. Questioning them can be quite revealing.
Have a great week,
Todd
“When you step into inquiry, your patterns change, and you become a total question mark.” Byron Katie, Question Your Thinking, Change The World.
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